Re: Abbott & Costello

Tech-Archive recommends: Repair Windows Errors & Optimize Windows Performance

From: Chat (talktome_at_here.com)
Date: 08/24/04


Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2004 18:53:45 GMT

I think it is funny - very funny - thanks for posting
this world needs to take a break and laugh - a lot - at itself

Chat
  "George" <null@null.51> wrote in message news:%23dH%23pKgiEHA.3172@tk2msftngp13.phx.gbl...
  With all the problems that people are trying resolve thru these newsgroups, I thought everyone should take a short break to enjoy this.

   

  This is even funnier if you are old enough to remember seeing "Who's on First" by Abbott and Costello. Costello wants to buy a computer from Abbott.

   

  ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

   

  COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

   

  ABBOTT: Mac?

   

  COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

   

  ABBOTT: Your computer.

   

  COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

   

  ABBOTT: Mac?

   

  COSTELLO: I told you, my name is Lou.

   

  ABBOTT: What about Windows?

   

  COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

   

  ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

   

  COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows?

   

  ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

   

  COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

   

  ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

   

  COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you got?

   

  ABBOTT: Office.

   

  COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

   

  ABBOTT: I just did.

   

  COSTELLO: You just did what?

   

  ABBOTT: Recommend something.

   

  COSTELLO: You recommended something?

   

  ABBOTT: Yes.

   

  COSTELLO: For my office?

   

  ABBOTT: Yes.

   

  COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

   

  ABBOTT: Office.

   

  COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

   

  ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

   

  COSTELLO: I already have an office, and it has windows! OK, let's just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

   

  ABBOTT: Word.

   

  COSTELLO: What word?

   

  ABBOTT: Word in Office.

   

  COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

   

  ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

   

  COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

   

  ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".

   

  COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?

   

  ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.

   

  COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need!

   

  ABBOTT: Real One.

   

  COSTELLO: If it's a long movie I also want to see reel 2, 3 and 4. Can I watch them?

   

  ABBOTT: Of course.

   

  COSTELLO: Great, with what?

   

  ABBOTT: Real One.

   

  COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?

   

  ABBOTT: You click the blue "1".

   

  COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?

   

  ABBOTT: The blue "1".

   

  COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue "W"?

   

  ABBOTT: The blue 1 is Real One and the blue W is Word.

   

  COSTELLO: What word?

   

  ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

   

  COSTELLO: But there's three words in "office for windows"!

   

  ABBOTT: No, just one. but its the most popular Word in the world.

   

  COSTELLO: It is?

   

  ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words.

   

  COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

   

  ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't even Part of Office.

   

  COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping, you have anything I can track my money with?

   

  ABBOTT: Money

   

  COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

   

  ABBOTT: Money.

   

  COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

   

  ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

   

  COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer?

   

  ABBOTT: Money.

   

  COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

   

  ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

   

  COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

   

  ABBOTT: One copy.

   

  COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

   

  ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

   

  COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

   

  ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

   

  (LATER) COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

   

  ABBOTT: Click on "START"



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