OT: Modern version of "Who's on First"?

Tech-Archive recommends: Speed Up your PC by fixing your registry

From: Gary Richtmeyer (glricht-RemoveMe-5_at_imailbox.com)
Date: 06/06/04 

Date: Sun, 6 Jun 2004 15:52:27 -0400

Hope nobody takes offense at humor being posted on this NG, but as a PC geek
I enjoyed this and figured other PC geeks could also use a laugh amidst all
the problems, viruses, BSODs, etc, etc, etc. Enjoy!

-- Gary Richtmeyer
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The Modern version of Abbot and Costello's "Who's on First"?

 ABBOTT: Thanks for calling the Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

 COSTELLO: Hello, I'm setting up an office in my den

 and thinking about buying a computer.

 ABBOTT: Mac?

 COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

 ABBOTT: Your computer?

 COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

 ABBOTT: Mac?

 COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

 ABBOTT: What about Windows?

 COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

 ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with windows?

 COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in

 the windows?

 ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

 COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer

 and software.

 ABBOTT: Software for windows?

 COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can

 use to write proposals, track expenses and run my

 business. What have you got?

 ABBOTT: Office.

 COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend

 anything?

 ABBOTT: I just did.

 COSTELLO: You just did what?

 ABBOTT: Recommend something.

 COSTELLO: You recommended something?

 ABBOTT: Yes.

 COSTELLO: For my office?

 ABBOTT: Yes.

 COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

 ABBOTT: Office.

 COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

 ABBOTT: I recommend office with windows.

 COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows!

 OK, let's just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I

 want to type a proposal. What do I need?

 ABBOTT: Word.

 COSTELLO: What word?

 ABBOTT: Word in office.

 COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

 ABBOTT: The word in office for windows.

 COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

 ABBOTT: The word you get when you click the blue "w."

 COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't

 start with some straight answers! OK, forget that.

 Can I watch movies on the Internet?

 ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.

 COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I

 watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I

 need!

 ABBOTT: Real One.

 COSTELLO: If it's a long movie and I also want to see

 reel 2, 3 & 4. Can I watch them too?

 ABBOTT: of course.

 COSTELLO: Great, with what?

 ABBOTT: Real One.

 COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a

 movie. What do I do?

 ABBOTT: You click the blue "one."

 COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?

 ABBOTT: The blue 1.

 COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue "w"?

 ABBOTT: The blue 1 is Real One and the blue "w" is

 Word.

 COSTELLO: What word?

 ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

 COSTELLO: But there's three words in office for

 windows!

 ABBOTT: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word

 in the world.

 COSTELLO: It is?

 ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other

 words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other

 words out there.

 COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

 ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One

 isn't even part of Office.

 COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about

 financial bookkeeping, do you have anything I can

 track my money with?

 ABBOTT: Money.

 COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

 ABBOTT: Money.

 COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

 ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

 COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer?

 ABBOTT: Money

 COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

 ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

 COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer?

 How much?

 ABBOTT: One copy

 COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

 ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

 COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

 ABBOTT: Why not, they own it. 

-- 
Big Dog

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