ports crash during a game?

XP-home/ SP2
Linksys WRT54G
4 computers on network- 1 is wireless laptop
cable modem(comcast)
2400cpu AMD
Ports are triggered to MSN zone to my masked IP
Ports are UDP/TCP forwarded to my mask IP

problem--- something during games is crashing my ports... my game crashes
with everyone disconnecting from me, which turns out i disconnect from them,
so its not a game crash its a disconnection to the game, which i know isn't
an interruption on ISP cause my zone lobby stays open and connected. But i
usually have more then one lobby open as its easier to find games that way
and they will crash most the time when this happens but one room, also winamp
i have playing in backround losses connection to the internet radio station.

I've read that all should have direct X 9.c to avoid problems, but how can
you police that.

I've also read SP2 should be on all the puters your connected with to avoid
problems, but i can't police that either.

I've tried to disable as much of the xp firewall as possible but its kind of
confusing how to individually open apps and ports, even though i have it
turned off theres still a bunch of things to configure on it.

So my question is-- whats causing me to disconnect from games mid game after
playing? Ive configured the roughter and tcp/ip ports open as much as
possible and tried to disable xp firewall as much as possible but its still
doing it.

Is there something i can do? Or is this problems with others having old
directX's not being updated and not having XP/SP2? Thats assuming everyone
runs XP?

Is there problems with porple running non microsoft O/S thats causing this?

I'm really confused......I have no idea if this will happen with other games
cause i've only been playing AoK C expansion

And if i needed to trigger the ports open to the game app? Whats the game
app called? i've looked in the remove/install programs and this game has a
very long name. does the game need to be triggered and not the zone or both?

hope someone can give me some ideas. cause this is happening a lot. tons of
poeple crash from games... this is so annoying.